Metra Commercial - ID# 100
Glenbrook South
Commercial
Entry Description
A young woman takes on her passion of exploring Chicago, she uses the Metra to transport her from the North Shore suburbs to the Windy City. Her story takes her around the city and back to her home easily accomplishing her goals.
Copyright Info
Recent Teacher Comments
- 4/26 9:26 am - The story of a young woman heading into the city is clear, but what is missing is more of an emphasis on the Metra train she took to get there. The story isn't about her in the city, the story is about her getting to the city. Show us more of her travel on the train and make us feel that her train ride was as enjoyable as her time in the city. The video work here and editing is well done!
- 3/4 8:52 pm - It's commendable that you've managed to create a compelling atmosphere that resonates with the spirit of the city and the experiences it offers. Achieving such a great vibe through your work is a testament to your creativity and understanding of the project's goals. The decision to rely on natural lighting for your cinematography has evidently paid off, providing a genuine and authentic visual experience. This approach not only highlights your ability to work effectively with available resources but also enhances the natural beauty and realism of the setting. It's a technique that requires skill and a good understanding of timing and positioning to capture the best possible light, and it seems you've managed this admirably. However, as you've noted, there is an opportunity to deepen the narrative specifically related to riding the Metra. A more detailed narrative could further engage viewers by connecting them emotionally to the experience of using Metra for their adventures in and around Chicago. Here are a few suggestions to enrich your commercial's narrative: Incorporate Personal Stories: Consider featuring brief testimonials or stories from real Metra riders sharing their experiences. This could include why they choose Metra for their travels, memorable moments they've had on the train, or how it facilitates their adventures in Chicago. Personal stories can create a stronger emotional connection with the audience. Highlight Destinations: While the adventures in Chicago are a key focus, emphasizing the various destinations that Metra can take riders to could add depth to your narrative. Showcasing specific locations or events that are accessible via Metra can illustrate the convenience and reach of the service, encouraging viewers to explore new areas. Focus on the Journey: Expand on the narrative by highlighting the experience of the journey itself. This could include the comfort and amenities of the Metra trains, the scenic routes that passengers can enjoy, or the anticipation of heading towards a new adventure. The journey on Metra is an integral part of the adventure. Use Voiceover or Text: Adding a voiceover or on-screen text can provide more context and information about riding the Metra. This could be used to narrate the story, highlight benefits, or share interesting facts about the service, helping to weave a more comprehensive narrative around the Metra experience. Showcase Diversity of Riders: Reflect the diversity of Chicago by showcasing a wide range of individuals and groups who use Metra. This inclusivity can help viewers see themselves in the commercial, further strengthening their connection to the narrative. By enhancing the narrative around riding the Metra, your commercial can serve not only as a visual treat but also as an informative and engaging piece that encourages viewers to consider Metra as their gateway to adventure in Chicago. Your ability to blend beautiful cinematography with a compelling story will undoubtedly make your commercial even more impactful.
Judge 1
Positives: Cool, vibey commercial with a clear story - good job! I think the edit pacing feels right, especially paired with a well chosen music track, and it does a good job of engaging me as a viewer. The talent's performance also felt right. Confident, adventurous, and breaks what could be a perception of Metra only being for commuters and suburbanites on Cubs/White Sox days.
Improvements: I don't see enough of the Metra experience, just at the open and close, and it's really quick. Conceptually, it makes sense to see a bunch of what Metra enables us to do, but I think there's an opportunity to blend those two worlds. Is she getting ready a bit on the train? looking out the window at the city in anticipation? Do we see her bring back stuff on the train when she leaves? As an example, could you do that lipstick reflection shot on the train? Ok - choice of shots - Some feel more effective than others - I challenge you to think about the intended audience here, and what resonates with them. In particular, would our talent grab a newspaper on their day in the city? What else could we see outside of that one panning shot of a retail store?
Judge 2
Positives: I really like the STORY of this commercial. This young woman is exploring the city, seeing cool places, doing exciting things... and she does this via the METRA. That is a great way to sell the METRA. This reminded me of some great airline commercials. Airline commercials never show people in line taking their shoes off at the airport, that would make me want to NOT buy plane tickets. Instead, airline commercials show people on beaches or buying exotic food at a restaurant in a cool country... THAT makes me want to buy plane tickets. You approached your commercial with that same concept, very well done. I really liked the camera work on much of the commercial. It's clear that you made a intentional effort to have camera MOVEMENT on most of the shots. Camera movement always interest the audience and keeps us engaged. Watch a movie from the 1950... There is often NO camera movement. And now it seems so boring because we are so used to fun pans, zoom ins/outs, racing focus, etc. You had a lot of great camera movement that paired well with the excitement of the commercial. Wait a minute... METRA... "I come and I go!" The young woman is moving. The camera is moving... That's great cohesive energy in your commercial. The commercial is about traveling, coming and going, etc. So the camera BETTER BE moving and traveling and having fun as well. Great job. Master filmmakers use camera movement to supplement the emotion of the scene / movie / commercial. If there is a demon hiding in the closet, the camera slowly creeeeeeps up to the closet. It's almost like even the camera is scared to look in there. You demonstrated this concept very well.
Improvements: The audio fade out, then fade in at 0:20 seems a little clunky to me, could have been a little more smooth. Perhaps just keep the song playing how it was and fade / cut the video to your "Anytime. Anywhere." text. It kinda felt like, oh the commercial is over, WAIT it's not over because the song is back, ok now it's over. The editing of the METRA text at the end... Something isn't fully clicking for me. I think the shrinking and spinning text just didn't add to the commercial like the other shots did. It did support your story because it was moving, but I had trouble reading the text. I think it would have been a little stronger to just stay black and show the text. Or maybe you can have the text slowly move away. But the spinning hindered me being able to read it. Commercials are ALL about the product you are selling. The product is the STAR, the word "METRA" is crucial that the audience sees it. SUMMARY: Great job! You have an eye for commercials. The shots are fun and alive. Sometimes people try to film commercials and they feel flat and boring. You totally get the fun fast paced feeling of how a commercial should look and feel and sound. Great job!
Judge 3
Positives: The shots were fun and dynamic! I like the music you chose as it added to the energy of the piece.
Improvements: Since you chose the tagline Anywhere. Anytime, I did not feel the shots told that story. You told an exploration story very well so it could have been a different tagline or a different story. A few city sounds integrated into the mix would have also heightened the time and place.
Judge 4
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Judge 5
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