A Love Worth Remembering - ID# 175

Wheaton-Warrenville South High School
Dramatic Narrative
Entry Description

A young girl discovers a box filled with her grandmother's old heirlooms, including a stack of letters addressed to her beloved overseas.

Copyright Info

Recent Teacher Comments

  • 4/30 7:44 pm - This is a lovely story with some nice performances. I like the audio mix of the VO and the music. It is subtle but it does a lot for tone. I also thought it was an interesting choice to obscure Christopher’s face throughout. Nice touch. I think he is supposed to be at war, but America doesn’t get involved in the war until 1941 and these letters are dated 1939. It might seem small, but the right dates would add to the realism unless you are not referring to WWII. I think this is a great story about connecting with the past. I really enjoyed it. Nice work!
  • 4/30 1:25 pm - The theatrics of this film feels nostalgic. The performance feels tender and genuine. The protagonist going from reading the letter to the memories playing out is a great transition. The scenes in which you cut back to the protagonist looking through objects in the attic is effective, a way to tie the two worlds. The sound mixing of the crowd chatter coming back in at the end pulls us back into the present. Great job!
  • 4/29 11:24 am - Strengths: Great performances by actors. Good variety of camera shots used to tell the story. Nice change in the color grading and speed for the flashback scenes- voiceover worked well. Very sweet (and sad) story. Improvements: Level for the room tone audio at the beginning was a bit loud and could've faded in a more realistic way. Could've added just a bit more dialogue to the opening sequence- I wanted to know the main character/her personality a bit more. Some jump cuts when taking items out of boxes.
Judge 1

Positives: I like the framing of the shots, it made the story easier to follow along with. The color effect put on the flashback worked well and told the audience what was happening in the story.

Improvements: I think having an older woman do the VoiceOver might have worked a little better. The beginning needs some music, but I also think some more camera movement would have been beneficial instead of mostly static shots.

Judge 2

Positives: Overall I think this story works at its best when it shows instead of tells. Really dug the use of color grading to put us back into the past at the end, and I think not showing anyone's face besides the grandmother was smart! Since that's the only person our main character would recognize, it makes sense the audience wouldn't see anyone else since we're in a memory. Some solid creative choices here!

Improvements: Pay a little more attention to your sound-- the chatter in the background was super distracting, and if you want it to sound like people at a party, be sure to find a sound effect that matches that; the background chatter sounded like something from a lunch room, or an office. Also, since this whole film is a voice over of a memory, slow down a little with choosing your camera shots; nothing felt particularly motivated. I felt like I was watching videography coverage for what should be a very intimate, and touching story.

Judge 3

Positives: I really like your idea of story and showing either your grandmother or a fictional grandmother's backstory and how it's triggered by finding this box of memorabilia. I also think that you did a good job of introducing the story bringing us into what your story is about and ending on a note that feels complete.

Improvements: I think it would be very worthwhile to revisit some foundational techniques like the 180° rule, where if you have two characters facing each other, you can't flip the camera to the other side of them so if you're looking over the left shoulder of one of your actors you need to be looking over the right shoulder of the other. The sound was also a major issue. There were sound effects like a crowd cutting in and out so without also seeing a crowd, there's a lot of confusion of. Is there a party going on? Is there an event. I think it's important to remember that even if you're not working with a lot of resources, you can scale back the idea to make the final project stronger like just take out the crowd and put something else like normal house ambience, and there would be a lot less confusion.

Judge 4

Positives:

Improvements:

Judge 5

Positives:

Improvements: