A Legal - ID# 188

Neuqua Valley
Comedic Narrative
Entry Description

A literal alien from outer space must prove his citizenship to the president of the United States before getting caught and deported from the land of the free.

Copyright Info

Recent Teacher Comments

  • 4/30 3:59 pm - What a great concept and very poignant. Very simple and funny. The alien voice was a bit much at times. The alien costume was very simple and well done. Great job!
  • 4/29 3:10 pm - Great job I can tell you spent a lot of work on this. Beautifully shot and the editing was very creative. I loved the alien voice, a cute little addition to a serious topic. If possible make sure the actor enunciates the words a little more just so your audience can tell what they are saying a little more clearly. All together you did an amazing job executing this film perfectly.
  • 4/29 11:59 am - It's always nice to see a good satire. Lots of good ideas in here. Nice job pushing things to absurdity - like the checklist. The camerawork and editing are solid. The acting is good, though at times the alien voice gets a little annoying. The costume worked well to add a cartoonish mood to this, including the tired eyes at the end. Overall good job taking a serious problem and drawing attention to it through comedy.
Judge 1

Positives: Great camerawork and lighting. All the shots felt intentional and had good variety. Good editing and use of VFX (like the dollar signs in eyes). It blended well with the cinematography and was really fun to watch.

Improvements: Some of the audio levels recorded on set were peaking at certain points while characters were shouting. A good way to avoid that is to keep the recording levels lower during those scenes and boosting it later. At the times the music and SFX were a little too loud. I'd recommended lowering SFX levels more than you think it actually needs in post-production. In my experience SFX is always louder to the audience than I think.

Judge 2

Positives: Excellent use of color, excellent snappy editing, interesting motion graphics. This piece of high hearted regarding the heated topic of today’s times. It’s very good that you are remaining relevant. You are on the right track. Nice job! Also, the costume design is really cool too! You really are very resourceful!w

Improvements: When an audience watches a film they are subconsciously digesting the visuals without realizing. It’s a very subtle, and yes, manipulative art form. The element that isn’t subconscious that dictates the collective memory of the audience, is the sound. Your sound is good. But there is too much of it. I like the approach of keeping things fun and almost cartoon like, but all the flashiness is taking away from the story. YOURE a very highly potentional, raw-talented Film maker but right now you are trying to get your feet wet indifferent genres, and you haven’t found your niche balance yet. Thats okay. It takes experience. I would recommend the church of Robert Zemeckis. Telling very emotionally poignant stories that utilize complex visual effects seamlessly. Try and be a little bit more patient with your edits, and your compositions. Give the actors and performances room to breathe. In any scene, two people have to try and get something from one another. That is the objective. If there is no conflicts, the scene falls flat. You are really very good. And I saw some excellent story telling with KING OF HEARTS. Keep stepping outside of your comfort zone to tell a story with minimal resources. This is a little absurdist. A fed wouldn’t beat around the bush like that. Your themes and nuance, holistic approach are a little scattered. i understand some of the jokes about the oil, but they are all low stakes. Try and think of it like this: You want to make stories about what you know. If all you know how to do is eat an apple, then you could make an award winning film about you eating an apple. It has happened! Watch more movies and try to apply the canvas creatively to your life experiences. Great Shot! But frankly what’s also holding me back giving this better credit is based on your other submission to MMEA where a yearbook is burnt in the end. Im sorry, but that really irked me. 8n an age of book banning, authoritarians , budget cuts to education, books are the refuge from darkness.

Judge 3

Positives: Lots of very funny gags, like the ball the milk. Nice twist at the end!

Improvements: This holds up very well as an off-the-wall style bizarre comedy. That said, there seems to be some vaguely political substance, without really having too much of a discernible message.

Judge 4

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Judge 5

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