Failure - ID# 182
Homewood-Flossmoor
Dramatic Narrative
Entry Description
A boy loves to skate and falls a lot, but he doesn't give up.
Copyright Info
Recent Teacher Comments
- 4/25 9:57 pm - Love the premise and really enjoy the reaction shots to the failure in the beginning.. The camerawork in the home was a bit shaky, and there was some muddy lighting (when two color temperatures noticeably conflict on camera). In regards to sound, i would suggest lowing the music and boosting the sounds from the skateboarding – skateboarding videos usually highten the skating sound, and it makes a difference in immersing the audience. Close up shots of the skater's face would also make a big difference in the ending in conveying emotion and keeping the audience engaged. Having them faceless makes me assume the skater was a "stunt person" in comparison to the actor at home. If you have stunt people, you still want to convince the audience that they are the original actor. Cutting from the skating to close ups could have done this. Some other statement after the successful trick may have driven the message home. Great montages, listening to the feedback above could bring this to the next level.
- 4/24 12:06 pm - The shots of the empty Chicago street are haunting. I love the reaction of the passers-by. But the story is weak. It looks like all you wanted to show is footage of skateboarding. The VO should not be telling the story.
Judge 1
Positives:
Improvements:
Judge 2
Positives:
Improvements:
Judge 3
Positives:
Improvements:
Judge 4
Positives:
Improvements:
Judge 5
Positives:
Improvements: