WIN DAY - ID# 19
Geneva
News Package
Entry Description
Geneva's 2nd annual "What I Need" Day focuses onstudents social and emotional health
Copyright Info
Recent Teacher Comments
- 3/3 11:34 am - I really like the vibe of this package and it fits the formula for what it should be. There was a nice explanation and clever writing. The narration voice matches the feel of the piece. I also like that the interviews seem sincere and not forced. There is not a name key on the first interview, there was enough time there. I really like the nat sound breaks you used to keep pacing fresh. I will say the stand-up was a little shocking, the suicide comment, while true, doesn't really feel like the right stat to share or rationale for the day. Also, name key for the reporter? You stole the Principal soundbite but said what he was about to say a word for word before he said it.
Judge 1
Positives: - You did a great job of incorporating different viewpoints on WIN Day and why it's so important. Great job telling the story! - It can be hard to balance light-hearted things with heavy things too. The moments you capture on camera of students enjoying the day really make this story. Nice work.
Improvements: - This story doesn't need the music, and it actually clashes with the karaoke you had. Instead, use natural sound --- the environment around you. Use quick pops of the students skating, singing, having fun. This helps us feel like we're there. - This story jumps all over the place visually, which can be ok, but the editing makes it feel discombobulated. Next time, be more intentional about recording sequences (wide shot, medium shot, tight shot). This will help you avoid jump cuts.
Judge 2
Positives: I like that you got broll from multiple activities
Improvements: Why did you add music to this? It was distracting off the bat. You had someone singing karaoke which would have been a great nat pop. The song was also competing with the nat sound already in the background. I would not interview 2 people at the same time if they're both not going to participate in the interview. I feel like you needed a little more context to the story. Did it start for fun or for mental health? Your standup didn't make sense if this wasn't about mental health
Judge 3
Positives: -Well written, reporter did a good job narrating the story --All interview subjects are framed well and each sound bite chosen elevated the piece.
Improvements: -The music was a little too loud over the reporter's voice. It would be better to just use natural sound from each clip as the reporter talks. --I would love to see more video sequencing of each scene... a series of shots including a wide establishing shot, medium shot, close up etc.
Judge 4
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Judge 5
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