Routine - ID# 228

Homewood-Flossmoor
Dramatic Narrative
Entry Description

A man lives every day exactly the same. That is, until he discovers that everything isn't quite as he left it.

Copyright Info

Recent Teacher Comments

  • 4/22 11:22 am - The setup was great and relatable, but it felt like a bit of an unexplained stretch him searching the attic for an SD card. The story was at its best when investigating the importance of routine, but the SD card reveal felt a bit forced and rushed. Excellent use of sound design to bring life to your film. Nice use of manual focus. Strong performance (and therefore, direction). Solid shot choices. Overall, a technically well executed and interesting story! I think a little more motivation behind the search for the SD card would go a long way in bringing this to the next level.
  • 3/14 9:12 am - Good job establishing the routine without making it too repetitive. The editing is well paced. I would like to see a little more suspense being built up throughout the beginning & middle of the story, though. Maybe get some shots framed from outside a doorway or window so it looks like the main character being watched. The ending had a good twist, but I was left wondering, "Why?" Why is this character being stalked? Why go into the attic? Why was the SD card left there? It's okay to leave some things a mystery, but I think there still needs to be some sort of explanation or resolution for at least a few of these questions.
  • 2/28 11:28 am - I love the idea and you set me up and have my attention all the way to the end because I want to see how you resolve the conflict - and you really do not. That's a let down. Also, the SD card comes out of nowhere - I wish you let the audience find it as well. Your actor did a good job staying in character and your camera angles and composition definitely help tell the story. I LOVE the close ups. Well done.
Judge 1

Positives: Big props for doing a piece without dialogue! The story is pretty solid here as well. The camerawork is consistent and doesn't distract too much. The audio track selections fit the tone of the story nicely.

Improvements: The story is pretty solid as something you just watch for entertainment, as it doesn't conclude or resolve a conflict. However, it could use some tightening up in the pacing, cutting those first few morning routines into a quicker montage style would help with that break in the repetition when we reveal that the cereal is in the wrong spot. Also, the audios is a bit unnatural- the music comes in and out jarringly, but the theme/tone is correct. I do think the film should have had some sort of resolution. The morning routine is interrupted, he finds out why, but now what does he do about it? That's where we can draw a conclusion, relate with our character better, and draw meaning from the story. What if the person that has been watching him is the audience of the short film themself? We have truly been watching him the whole time.

Judge 2

Positives: The framing of each chest was really good and I liked that there were some unique shots. The camera movements were also well done with the pans. I enjoyed how you didn't really know where the storyline was going or why things were changing and the editing at the end was done well.

Improvements: I thought the framing and movements of each shot were good, but make sure the right elements are in focus. I noticed there were a few shots out of focus. I think you could have used some dialogue even just with one character, he could have been asking himself questions as to why things were different.

Judge 3

Positives: You have some very interesting and effective camera angles. It's refreshing to see the variety of compositions and angles that support your story.

Improvements: Consider cutting down the repeat routine scenes. Leave the first one exactly as it is. Then, streamline the second instance. Then, the third time, when things start to change, make it more apparent that there is change and that the man is struggling with that. For example, put the cereal box in an open cabinet or against a completely different background. Since it's against a different part of the same wall in both instances, it's not apparent that the box has moved from the area next to a window to another part of the wall. The colors and textures are similar. Think about ways to make it apparent the man is agitated by his routine changing. At about 3:10, show the plug in the sink closed.

Judge 4

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Judge 5

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