Incoming Freshman Activity Night PKG - ID# 459
Glenbrook North
News Package
Entry Description
A News Package on the Incoming Freshman Athletics and Activity Night, focusing on why it is an important for the clubs.
Copyright Info
Recent Teacher Comments
- 4/30 10:31 pm - This was done very well. This is the perfect example of what a news package should look like. The structure, the delivery, and the variety of b-roll and soundbites check every box. I also like how you didn't just tell this story as an event, but personalized it with interviews from people who care about their organizations.
- 3/12 2:39 pm - It was an informative story with good shots. Beware of jump cuts and too many similar looking shots. The track was good and the writing was solid. You made a good story out of a typical activity and that's not easy so good job!
Judge 1
Positives: - I really like how you told this story. Hearing from the students themselves on the value of their clubs and this night was really cool. Liked seeing them in front of their club posters too. - You did a good job writing this. It balances their soundbites with your track well.
Improvements: - We need way more shot variety. Think wide, medium, tight. You didn't have many tight shots, so we're kind of seeing the same thing over and over, just in different places. - This story needs natural sound. You could mic up a student and follow them along as they go through learning about clubs, or mic up a club leader trying to connect with people. Hearing these interactions brings the viewer in and draws their attention
Judge 2
Positives: Strong delivery by the reporter. The story was well written to describe what we saw in some of the videos.
Improvements: -Try to shoot in sequence. Get a wide shot then close up of the same shot to diversify your angles and help the story move along. -I would suggest starting stories with characters to make it more personable. For instance, you could've started with video of a student setting up a booth and them describing what it means for them to get ready for this day... then transition to shots of the event and how they are one of many students participating, etc. It helps personalize the story.
Judge 3
Positives: While still providing a solid overview of the event, the package was made more engaging by focusing in on three clubs with interviews to describe their approach to attracting new members. This package had a nice flow, progressing from the challenges of attracting new members, and then resolution in the final piece of the voiceover.
Improvements: This package could have used a few more elements to take it to the next level. Some reporter stand-up shots, at least at the beginning and end, would've made it more professional. And since this was an event for incoming freshman, interviews with a few eighth graders would've been appropriate. They could've provided prospective on whether the clubs were providing the right information. While the reporters' voiceover audio sounded fine, the audio of the first two interviews sounds tinny and the last interview sounded distorted.
Judge 4
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Judge 5
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