Home Past Break - ID# 488

New Trier
Dramatic Narrative
Entry Description

An pressure applied long enough is bound to burst the bubble. A story of one young man's breaking point.

Copyright Info

Recent Teacher Comments

  • 4/22 11:56 am - I wanted to keep watching when the 5 minutes were up, which is a great sign. Outstanding internal, heartfelt, and believable performances. The conflict with the father was quite powerful. The film reminds me a lot of "The Graduate," which is definitely a compliment. In regards to lighting and color, the color balance felt a bit green and orange. It's great that you color graded with style, but it's helpful to film in log or raw if you are going to be so stylized. The camera was at times far too shaky, Some of the audio was too quiet, but overall it was polished and clear. Loved the lighter transition. Excellent job really going for it! This was a deep and powerful story and short film.
  • 3/19 9:51 am - Pros: Well done with your exposure in a low-light environment. You grabbed my attention immediately with your ability to set the scene. Your ability to show time passing with the bags disappearing was a great touch to this story. You had great cinematography and lighting which aided with the emotion you were trying to convey. Your lighter transition was brilliant. Well done with this story. Cons: There were a few shots it almost seemed like you could hear the mic moving on the camera with the movement, try and use a gimbal in this situation if you can. I feel that adding some emotion to some of these intense shots between dad and son, has some background music as well. You added this in the end when he was playing with the lighter, and this really helped me feel the emotions of your characters. I am assuming the story goes on longer since it stopped dramatically at 5:00 minutes.
  • 2/21 1:10 pm - I love your lighting: it's moody and sad and fits your story. You THOUGHT about it! It's a choice, not a default. It's bold. Very Darren Aronofsky of you. I also love that you leave the story "open." The match-cut between the lighters is brilliant. Not a fan of the camera angle on dad's last line - not sure why you chose to do that.
Judge 1

Positives: Solid, engaging narrative that didn't give too much away to the audience - successfully creating suspense and allowing the audience to lean in. Framing and composition was also very strong, keeping the audience grounded in the lead and navigating low-light scenarios well with contrast. Very well done.

Improvements: There were additional opportunities to add tension and suspense in the party with the 'conflicting narratives' the Dad provided - that his Dad did that tells a lot, and I would have liked to discover that alongside the main character instead of being given it at the end. I also felt the argument at the end could have blown up a bit more - don't diffuse it. Let the embarrassment and anger bubble to the surface and see what happens!

Judge 2

Positives: I really like the locations you filmed in, they made the film come together to make it more dramatic. I like that you had multiple adult actors in the scene when the parents had friends over, it made it more realistic.

Improvements: I understand wanting to use darker coloring for a more emotional film, but I think it could have been much better off not playing with the color correction too much. Make sure the main areas of the shot are in focus, especially when it is an important moment. Also make sure the audio matches up with the dialogue.

Judge 3

Positives: The argument scene was shot and edited really well, also great acting with the dad and chemistry between the two. The behind the head shots are great! Specifically pointing to the one with the mom and the car, and then the dealer at the end. The one take shot is also pretty fun with the sea of characters, it really helps establish the guy’s character since he’s putting on an act for the party guests.

Improvements: It would be good for the audience to know what happened to the kid at school so that we could be emotionally engaged and on his side. That way we’d feel it more at the end. He lives in a really nice house, but also says he had to pay for his college, so we’re not sure exactly what his background is. There’s not enough info to know if we should like him and be on his side, or if we should feel bad for the parents. Overall, this story has been told many times, what’s your spin on it?

Judge 4

Positives:

Improvements:

Judge 5

Positives:

Improvements: