Yamaha - Trumpet Commercial - ID# 550
Wheeling High School
Commercial
Entry Description
A young musician's journey from first note to mastery, captured through home video and cinematic footage. One Yamaha trumpet. One story. Your sound, your journey.
Copyright Info
Recent Teacher Comments
- 3/3 7:51 am - I really like the concept and narrative you have going here about the passage of time and life. I think you can even shorten up some of those shots at the beginning. The point could be made that you're a little kid growing up without showing the parent or adult at the beginning talking to the subject. I like the use of music on and off, however, and think that was a strong stylistic choice.
Judge 1
Positives: - I thought it was such a cute concept! I loved the opening clip and the nostalgic feel of it. The montage of the musician getting older was awesome. Very inspiring! - I liked the song choice
Improvements: - The change to the concert scene was a tiny bit jarring, I almost might have preferred the music staying underneath it or something to make it feel more connected to the beginning of the commercial. - I was a bit confused by by the tagline at the end, seemed like it was saying life without music is Yamaha, which doesn’t sound like a good thing.
Judge 2
Positives: Love seeing the main character grow up and get better at the instrument - very strong concept. Some nice moments jump cutting as the main character gets older. Nice job setting mood as well.
Improvements: This plays as a short film, not really a commercial. There is little understanding as to why Yamaha is better or different than other brand instruments. Your piece is more about committing to something - could it be for a school of music? Something to think about... Take your time to rethink this as an actual spot and edit it accordingly. You have some really great moments and ideas in the piece with the jump cuts getting older and walking onto the stage. How can you tighten the piece up so it moves a bit faster and sells the product?
Judge 3
Positives: really cool. Great storytelling! love the use of archival footage. The tagline leading to the absence of music is a really powerful way to end the spot!
Improvements: Camera work. Woulda loved more variety in shots and more care applied to composition. Lighting coulda been improved, better showing our hero characters emotion.
Judge 4
Positives: Great job telling the story of the protagonist and showing how the product contributed to that transformation! I also loved seeing older footage repurposed into this piece which was very creative. Overall, great work!
Improvements: I think the pacing could be faster, and adding quicker cuts when the actor walks on stage would help. We could also consider skipping some of the practice sections to show the transformation more quickly. The black screen pause in the middle of the piece could also be removed to keep the pacing tight and the story flowing.
Judge 5
Positives:
Improvements: