The Breakthrough - ID# 563
Glenbrook South
Seven Day Challenge
Entry Description
A girl is haunted by former memories.
Copyright Info
Recent Teacher Comments
Judge 1
Positives: I love the casting choices. Very real when you're building a narrative like this. It grounds it in reality. Dialogue is believable and well written and acted. I like how your shots build tension as she looks through the yearbook and you wait to reveal her picture on the page. The final shot with your lead's smile gives us some lovely resolution.
Improvements: I'd like to see you go more artistic or experimental with this one. You have the opportunity to make her memories very dreamy. Closeups, montages, black and white/sepia are your friend. I'd like to see more relationship built in the beginning with some dialogue or more moments together in different locations to build the relationship. Ask yourself, why are they so close? What does it mean to your lead to see her face again? What does it mean to heal?
Judge 2
Positives: Overall, the film is technically sound! The cold, dark tones contrast the warm, faded, and well-done slow shutter nicely.
Improvements: The tone remains consistently dreary and it's hard to feel the emotional impact of the ending when we live in a world where you can pull up an image of someone whenever you'd like. Maybe think about the setting of where the story takes place?
Judge 3
Positives: The story is very powerful and effectively conveys the emotional pain the main character is experiencing. The music track strongly supports the tone and enhances the overall emotional impact. It was an excellent choice.
Improvements: To strengthen the flashbacks, consider including more interaction between the two girls. These moments could also serve as effective b-roll throughout the project, helping to deepen the audience’s emotional connection. Saying goodbye after a loss, especially at a young age, is incredibly difficult, and your portrayal of the main character’s struggle to let go at the end is meaningful and believable. You might also consider incorporating one or two flashback shots where the two girls share a final, quiet moment, maybe a subtle parting glance. Placing this just before cutting back to present time, following the therapy session, could create a more emotional and meaningful transition and reinforce the sense of closure.
Judge 4
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Judge 5
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