Silver

Leaf Noir

Libertyville

Humorous Narrative

Entry Description

A football player is accused of misplacing recycables. Spoof on film noir.

Judge 1

Positives: The black and white along with the retro text really caught my attention. There were definitely funny moments and the dialogue was strong. "You have the right to recycle." Hilarious.

Improvements: Try to trim down your scenes to avoid repetitiveness. Them proving they can recycle dragged on in the middle a bit. Sometimes shorter and punchier can be more effective than quantity. Not much else!

Judge 2

Positives: Creative spoof on a noir film. Well thought out idea and creatively constructed. The choice to do black and white was fitting to the story and added to the tone.

Improvements: If only the ending had someone getting caught. Had all the elements of a classic noir except the ending. Someone always gets caught.

Judge 3

Positives: The stylistic choice of Noir was executed well as an homage to true Noir. Having the opening credits play all the way through was a nice throw back to early film-making. The harsh contrast of light and dark was also nicely executed although at times a more light was necessary. Great choice of music.

Improvements: The story lacked a driving force. There was never an explanation as to why this football player was being tormented for his recycling pattern. Nor was it ever established if he actually knew what he was doing or not. Establishing early on that the football player was dumb; i.e. "23" for the number "32", didn't have much pay off (i.e. he's really smart and knows how to recycle) or the contrary of him being extremely dumb. This element fell flat. Insert shots of the bin choices would have helped the audience figure out if they were actually recycling properly. What was the overall point of having a good cop & bad cop of recycling?