Silver

The Warrior: Episode 1

Deerfield

Humorous Narrative

Entry Description

All high schools could use a superhero to help out a little- and Deerfield High School, The Home of The Warriors is no different. Josh Simons introduces us to a new masked man patrolling the halls of DHS in the name of justice and First Class behavior: The Warrior.

Judge 1

Positives: Awesome idea. I love the main character. Such a protagonist. "Im going to take you to the DEAANNNNNSS!" Hilarious. You have an awesome opening montage. Its funny ("Hero!") and I know exactly what I am getting into just by watching it. Good work.

Improvements: I would focus on choosing your hallway locations based on where it looks best on camera. There were a couple hallway shots where your white balance got messed up by the sun through windows. But there were other hallways that look great and consistent in color. I feel like it could have used more music. There were a couple scenes where the hero is creeping around and it could be enhanced by some creeping music. Also the slo-mo part could use some great action music.

Judge 2

Positives: Great opening show credits. Set up the character and story well. Loved the life lesson / theme closing at the end. Great use of slow and fast motion.

Improvements: Try and keep your voice over sound levels consistent with your dialogue sound levels.

Judge 3

Positives: Nice costume. Very unique. Good composition and exposure overall. The use of speed ramps to amplify the superhero's super powers was nice. VERY COOL end credits. The stylization of comic book credits was a nice touch.

Improvements: Some use of additional sound effects may have helped amplify the story, also giving your warrior more character. You preface superhero powers and rules in the VO but never explain or show his powers, other than super speed. This could have been cut out of the piece or needed to be utilized. Otherwise it's just extraneous information that doesn't help the narrative.