Dectective

Maine South

Comedic Narrative

Entry Description

He solves crimes. He's always on the lookout for his next case. He may have been born in the wrong time.

Judge 1

Positives: Good device moving between the main character's fantasy and reality. Nice camerawork. Nice dedication to stringing out a story front to back.

Improvements: Anti-climactic. Pay off the build up next time with something the audience wants to see, like a battle.

Judge 2

Positives: I liked the concept of this piece. It could of gone the "Austin Powers" route, a man truly removed from time, instead I see a man from another time only in his mind. That's more interesting. You didn't go with the "I don't understand this new world" device, which I think is lazy. Instead you went for something more psychological, which I think is more interesting. Hold onto this idea, develop it more. I don't normally like when film makers use black and white to indicate a change in time, but in this case it worked well. You did your research with some of the "old timey slang," good job. There were some good dramatic shots, the overhead in the beginning, the low angle close ups and the tracking shot in the parking garage (although I would of liked to see that one go longer.)

Improvements: The ending was a bit anticlimactic. Not saying you need a fight scene necessarily, but some sort of struggle where the hero beats or outwits the villain. A better payoff as they say. Watch other detective movies like "The Maltese Falcon" or even "Sherlock Holmes" for inspiration. The pacing was a little slow. Some of the scenes could of been cut quicker. It's a detective piece which is supposed to be dramatic, but it's also a comedy which needs to move. Quick fix: I would have the sister character revoice over (ADR) her line in the beginning. It was the only one I really couldn't understand. Bad audio is the death of a promising piece. Doesn't matter how great your movie looks, if the audio isn't good, no one will take it seriously.

Judge 3

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Judge 4

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