For You

Glenbrook South

Seven Day Challenge

Entry Description

Two teenagers come to their senses about a troubling relationship.

Judge 1

Positives: All of your shots and framing were really strong and told the story well! The opening fight scene had a great balance between their two closeups that added to the tension in the scene and how claustrophobic the characters feel in their relationship. The cut back to the wider two shot works well then to let the scene breathe, and then it's a great cut back in closer when the tension spikes again. The montage of the park sequence works really well. The shots, the cutting and the music work together really well to establish a "good" day for these two characters, and quickly shows how that changed.

Improvements: Some of the fight scenes felt like the lasted a bit too long. They could have had more impact with fewer and more intense lines. The ending could have been more clear. Why does he say he didn't expect her to watch the video? Didn't he leave it there for her? Her line in response also isn't completely clear. Are they reconciled now because of this? Because if so, her line still feels hostile instead of forgiving.

Judge 2

Positives: The filmmakers demonstrate an excellent mastery of camera work and lighting. Some camera movement could be improved and the close up of the female character in the first scene feels awkward in the framing, but overall excellent clarity, focus, framing, and lighting. The limit to two characters in the story is effective in the span of the film and the conflict in the narrative is clearly defined.

Improvements: The goals of the characters could be more clearly defined as could the context of the story. A more varying build up in intensity of fight scenes could help to add tension and progress the story along. The scenes could be made more interesting with a larger variety of locations. Additionally the use of titles to delineate time in relation to scenes feels unnecessary and distracts.

Judge 3

Positives:

Improvements:

Judge 4

Positives: There are some creative shots in this video. I like the overhead of the computer when she see the flash drive. The outdoor scenes are well shot, with really good movement to them.

Improvements: Watch the lighting. Some of the shots have different colors than others in the beginning. Try to level that out. The problem for the viewer is that they do not have a reason to care about the characters. There is nothing that really draws us towards them or the relationship. I see him trying, but not her.