I Killed Someone - ID# 268

Homewood-Flossmoor
Dramatic Narrative

Entry Description

A story about re-capturing your life after a big mistake- with another one.

Recent Teacher Comments

  • 4/28 12:26 pm - This piece reflects the care you take when using your camera. Your cinematography stands out in this category. Your story holds together relatively well, but the narrative does lag at times. You devote shots to establish the pensive nature of the characters, but you may have wanted to find ways to incorporate more narrative detail in these shots. On a related note, more exposition would help the viewer understand the characters and their relationship better. Sound of shovel - nice touch!
  • 4/11 8:46 am - Positives: The storyline is very interesting and unique. There are many kinds of ways to portray a murder story, and this one is unlike most other horror stories. Additionally, the actors did an amazing job at portraying the story line and producing true emotion. This helped the video truly come to life. Although a little bit young, the actors looked old enough to properly portray the characters they did. Additionally, the cinematography was well done. It was clear that the cinematographer knew how to use the equipment, especially the camera, properly in order to create the best outcome. The video had good lighting, making the scenes that were light contrast the darker scenes. Criticism: Although interesting, the storyline was confusing. Additionally, there was a possible tangent introduced when the woman who murdered asked her friend for help and the friend knew all of the detail to complete the crime. I wish that had been expanded upon to provide an even more interesting plot. The audio in the beginning was clearly inserted, possibly due to issues in capturing the natural sound of the clip. While it worked, it was clear that the audio was not the same as the true audio. As well, the wind noise cuts out, causing some continuity errors in the video. Additionally, it would have been nice for the opening and closing scenes to also have the continuity of being dark/shot at night to keep the eeriness of the story. Finally, I wish that there were some shots of the “dead body” or the process of the women disposing of the body. This would have completed the story and shown another aspect that is important to the plot overall. I think that this important element was missing in the video. Overall, I really enjoyed this video and it was excellently created!
  • 3/7 9:08 am - Bad audio in first parking lot scene. Should have been redubbed.
  • 3/5 9:07 pm - While I enjoyed this, the fact that there are so many loose ends was a bit of a bummer. It seems like it could have been paced more quickly for at least a couple of reveals—some ambiguity is a good thing, but too much is just frustrating. All technical aspects well done!
Judge 1

Positives: Great framing on the shots. I thought they help tell your story. Try to add a couple of more angles if possible. I like the premise of the story, I actually wanted even more detail and information, Great job by the actors on this piece.

Improvements: There are a couple of shots that go out of focus for what appears no reason. They become more of a distraction than a help. Also, I like the way that you build the story, but then you don't develop the reason the one girl wants to help. There is a reason she knows all of this information, why/ It is alright to leave with some questions, but that is a big one. I would not have had the girl drag the shovel at the end. This cause a major break in break in what is a serious story.

Judge 2

Positives: Lots of really good camera work. Well thought out shots, interesting compositions, good visual storytelling. Audio was a little spotty- got better later on. Good soundtrack, proper levels (mostly), dialogue sounded clear. Very solid performances from your actors. I like the title "Ride" way better than "I Killed Someone."

Improvements: Some of the dialogue was pretty expositional, and yet the story gets a little murky to me. Your lighting is a bit uneven. Some shots are too dark with little to no fill. Some are overexposed. As much as I like your camera work, some of your movement is a little shaky. All of this is a bit nit-picky. Some good work. Keep at it.

Judge 3

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Judge 4

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