Bauer - Own the Moment - ID# 497
West Chicago
Commercial
Entry Description
Moments are fleeting. When it's time to own yours, what will you reach for? Own the moment. Reach for Bauer.
Recent Teacher Comments
- 4/27 6:52 am - Good use of VO - however the levels need to be higher for this VO - at times it was very hard to hear what was being said. Large variety of b-roll for this commercial. Very nice ending shot - the slow motion fit the pacing of the commercial and the sun in the background glistening off the ice was a nice touch.
- 3/6 7:14 pm - Great camera work with the shots. I like the variety that you offer and the detail. If I would offer one thought about them it is that I think there are time you could have been even closer on shots. The one where he is taping the stick, move the camera closer, or even the mic, so that you get great natural sound and even more detail. Make sure that you focus your audience on exactly what you are trying to sell. Show the blades, show the name on the skates. The big issue that I have is the audio. I think that it is hard to hear the narration during the commercial. I do not clearly hear the voice until the end, and that makes it tougher for the audience to hear what you are trying to sell. This can be fixed by lowering the volume on the music and raising the voice over a little bit. Overall very good job on this and keep up the good work.
- 3/5 5:28 am - Camera – Great shots, variety and I love the different angles way to mix up the perspectives. I also like the intentionality of your shots, you seem to know what you want your audiences to see. Love the mix of authentic audio presenting itself in certain scenes the skates scraping on the ice lends itself well to this piece. Music choices was good, just a bit dominating at times, narrators voice seems to be competing with the music. Good story, good writing. Nice closing scene. Some suggestions: when making a commercial be careful not to include other brands into it I distinctly remember seeing a Columbia logo on the fleece, so when you audience is looking for a brand to see what the commercial is about be careful not to mislead them. Your commercial was good the way it was but one of my students thought it would be cool if cross cut to NHL/Patrick Kane doing the same shots your actor was doing. Great job, I thought it was effective.
Judge 1
Positives: 1. Really enjoyed the camera work & the shot choice 2. The editing & storytelling was very well done - easy to follow and understand
Improvements: 1. The music seemed to be a strange choice - I liked that it built as the story developed but maybe something with more energy to match the visuals 2. The VO wasn't high energy enough - sounded flat.
Judge 2
Positives: Ending sequence really nice: slo-mo, logo, sound of skates a great ending to the piece. Some nice action footage of the skating/shooting, etc. I thought the music track was a good choice...is that from Truman show? Sounded very similar and had a nice vibe for the messaging of your spot. Very nice voice on the VO--let the voice be the star instead of the music! Nicely composed piece. Maybe need to develop the theme of "moment" a bit more...i.e. starts with practice on the pond, ends with full uniform and a shot on goal on an ice rink in a game. I think the moment you were going for was after all the "practice" on the pond and in the actual game, scoring the winning goal or something like that. You'd know better what the moment is...just be sure you end there :-)
Improvements: I like some of your included field sound...but about halfway through it got to be a little too much. When doing your soundtrack, try to balance out your VO and music a bit more so you're not so UP/DOWN with the music specifically. I thought your VO could have come up to match the music a bit more (couple lines a bit harder to hear/understand)
Judge 3
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Judge 4
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