Conceal - ID# 551

Glenbrook North
Dramatic Narrative

Entry Description

In an attempt to hide his father's abusive tendencies, Cameron drifts away from girlfriend until it all comes to fruition with a conflict at school. Upon a coincidental meeting at a local convenience store, their problems subside.

Recent Teacher Comments

  • 4/28 1:00 am - Your narrative centers on a real problem confronting far too many teenagers. I like how you establish the relationship between the young couple before you introduce the abusive father. This structure intensifies the viewer's reaction to the father. His behavior feels even more reprehensible because the viewer knows and likes the boy and his relationship with his girlfriend. When working on future projects, pay careful attention to how the audio from one shot compares to the audio from the next shot. You will have an easier time achieving continuity when the audio from one shot sounds like it was recorded at the same time and place as the previous shot in the scene. Also, look for ways to shorten your scenes without compromising the narrative detail revealed in the scene. Let your stories be presented in a more economical manner.
  • 3/7 9:03 am - The background audio in Walgreens changes in each shot. Could have dubbed audio over for continuity.
  • 3/4 1:21 pm - Dialogue is hard to understand at times—makes it hard to follow. Liked the transition at 3:40! Good diversity of shots. I like that you deal with this serious subject and try to see the subtle ways the male character is affected.
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