//Sent - ID# 584

Eisenhower

Seven Day Challenge

Entry Description

A boyfriend's rage leads to permanent consequences.

Recent Teacher Comments

Judge 1

Positives: 1. Using the headphones to make us think that she couldn't hear him was a smart choice. It distracted us enough to make us think she was purposefully ignoring him, and then made the end reveal that much more of a surprise. The on screen texts also looked great! 2. The lighting switch at the end was really successful! Having the room be dark and using the projector as a light source made the moment that much more dramatic. And having his face reflected in the water by his feet was a nice touch!

Improvements: 1. There needed to be a little bit more backstory and/or introduction to these characters. We have no idea how they know each other, who is dating who, or why they're sitting at this bonfire together. Overall, the story needed a bit more exposition so that we understand the relationship dynamic better. 2. The first scene just needed a lot of clarification. The one student randomly states he's finished a project and is carrying a stapler - but it is never acknowledged again. Also they're all sitting at the fire like friends, but then the line "leave that pretty lady alone" makes it feel as if they are strangers. The fight also escalates way too quickly --- this needs to be drawn out longer to let the tension build before a fight would break out. It felt too quick and lacked any real emotional or narrative weight.

Judge 2

Positives:

Improvements:

Judge 3

Positives: The on screen texts looked professional. I take that very seriously. The water enveloping the guy at the end also looked cool.

Improvements: The plot made no sense. Why show a scene at the beginning that doesn't even slightly hint at the fact that he could have died. The movie moves too quickly without leaving any impact on the viewer.

Judge 4

Positives:

Improvements: