Spectral Security - ID# 162

Mundelein

Division: AA

Dramatic Narrative

Entry Description

A school security guard staying late discovers he might not be all alone in the school.

Recent Teacher Comments

• 4/2 11:34 am - Spectral Security Good lighting Nice special effects (alien) Scary Good sound design, music Why is a scrawny teenager playing a security guard
• 3/11 3:19 pm - Story: Lots of good work here, but I don’t find the story to be a strong suit. The set up of the kid going into the security office is pretty vague and underdeveloped. (Why is a kid in charge of turning out the lights in the security room?) From there, the story is still pretty basic- he sees the ghost figure on camera and then it’s in the room with him. Cool, kind of creepy, but not especially well developed. I don’t really get the jump cut back to the security room right in the middle. Overall, this seems like a story built around showing the ghost figure effect. Camera: Some good work here. Nice variety of shot compositions, some good camera moves. You have a lot of low light shots that you handle well. And the ghost figure is well done too. Lighting: For all the low light situations you give yourself, you handle most of them them quite well. Sound: Levels good. Music good. Mix is good. Editing: Pretty slick work. Flows well. Sound FX work well with your visuals. Good work. Final Thoughts: If take all these skills and apply them to a more sophisticated story, you’d be going home with an award.

Judge 1

Positives:

Improvements:

Judge 2

Positives: The spirit effects were extremely well-realized. The idea of seeing a sprit in a video feed as you but not physically seeing the spirit was an inventive idea.

Improvements: The character says “this can’t be happening again”, which implies that he has a history with this spirit - what is this history, and how does this backstory play into his character arc? The ending was a little jarring - I wanted to know more about the spirit’s intentions and its relationship with our main character.

Judge 3

Positives: The visual FX of the ghost thing are quite good. Your sound and sound mix are strong as well.

Improvements: I didn't totally get the story. I was trying to figure out what this kid was doing at school alone. (I thought his mom texted him at the beginning.) So, I didn't exactly get it from a logic point of view. But your description here says he's a security guard. The problem is that he looks 15, is wearing a hoodie, and responds to a text that he'll be right home. (Typically, security guards have set hours and can't just knock off for the night if they get a text.) And if you're going for the shock ending of him getting eaten or whatever, I think maybe a smash cut to black off his reaction shot while he's still in the security room would work better than having him checking his phone then running into the hall.

Judge 4

Positives:

Improvements: