Metra Commercial; MMEA - ID# 259
Waubonsie Valley
Division: A
Commercial
Entry Description
Commercial for Metra Rail
Recent Teacher Comments
- 4/24 5:47 pm - I liked the pacing of the editing. Shot selection was well done. Graphic at the end was well designed.
- 4/19 11:13 am - The intro sequence of the girl getting ready and going to the station was well shot and edited, but I was at a loss as to what the commercial was really promoting until the very end. It might have played a little better if you focused more on the trip on the train to and from the destination rather than the one-way trip to the station platform. The music choice was great and I really enjoyed the natural sounds that were mixed in. The camera work was creative and connected well showing all of the steps in the process.
- 3/11 3:33 pm - Your commercial implies that relationships can be formed while on the train. In other words, riding a train to one's destination does not have to be a lonely or solitary experience. This seems like an appropriate appeal to use in order to motivate people to take the train rather than some other form of transportation. If you were pitching this ad to Metra, what might they feel is missing from the message? Your commercial makes travelling on the train seem easy and comfortable, but it does not specifically promote the Metra brand. You do not necessarily have to hit your audience over the head with this branding, but you might have found some subtle ways to inject Metra's logo and the company's desired image. You include effective transitions to move the girl from one location to the next and condense the passage of time. What else might you do to shorten this story in order to provide time to include more elements celebrating the Metra brand? I like how you include diegetic sound elements (doors closing, train arriving) in certain shots . Are there other shots that might benefit from this technique? For example, perhaps you could have included a touch of laughter when the girls are interacting.
- 3/7 4:07 pm - SOUND Song choice was good, I love the natural sound of the alarm clock, would have loved a few more of those to pop in throughout the video. Splice in song at 30 seconds was easy to pick out, it is hard to hide those types of things when there is no other natural sound or dialogue, I always try to tell my student to hide the splice under something else. STORY Knowing it was a commercial I was trying to figure out what it was a commercial for - in the first 30 seconds I really got no clues. Then finally when the young lady got to the train station she stood in front of the sign saying what stop it was and therefore missing the opportunity to drive the point home she was at a train station. Next time try and get to the product faster. Even once she was on the train, I wasn’t sure it was a metra commercial because the whole video felt like the destination was going to be really important so when she got to the station and it was over I felt a little let down. The way it was played, the two girls were total strangers in one scene, and then shortly after seemed to get along really well, again just made it hard to follow and know what is important and realistic and what is not. I loved the concept, I guess I just would have loved a little more of the product placement, metra tickets, metra train going down the tracks/RR crossing etc. Nothing to obvious but subtle enough so the viewer has a sense of where you are going with it all. CAMERA/VISUALS I thought you had some great shots that made me connect (ie looking for a seat on the train, pointing out the window, train coming into the station) The idea of getting in and out of the cab was a nice concept but the two shots weren’t framed identical. Overall I can see your attention to planning and detail to mix up the shots, good job. EDITING Good flow, never felt choppy or too sappy, just right good pace.
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