Paralyzed - ID# 501
Neuqua Valley
Division: A
Seven Day Challenge
Entry Description
A handicapped teenager is attacked and loses a box he was to open on his 18th birthday from his estranged father.
Recent Teacher Comments
Judge 1
Positives: Great match cuts! From the basketball hoop, to the coffee cup to the wheelchair wheel, they were all super strong and worked super well to convey the passing of time. Awesome use of music. It felt like it really fit the mood of the piece and kept the story moving. And smart choices of where to use it and where not to use it. You could've had the entire film scored, but that could've oversaturated it - whereas using it where you did made those moments feel extra impactful and really stand out.
Improvements: The story could've been a bit clearer at points. It didn't seem super necessary why the younger brother at the skate park needed to be included. You could've easily just had Matt know about the party and it would've tightened the script a bit. I felt like him not opening the box was a bit of an anti-climactic ending. There was so much tension in the conversation between him and his brother that it felt like there was a big build for what was going to be in the box. I was very curious to know what was in there and it sort of felt like a cop-out to not ever reveal that.
Judge 2
Positives: The ending was very appropriate - the son lets go of his father. The lighting in the first scene was quite good - good choice of location.
Improvements: Some scenes looked ok, while others had a lot of frontal lighting and double shadows. Just repositioning your lights could have improved your look. I suggest you look up these concepts: "Far-side key lighting", "Types of diffusion", "Three-point lighting". These basic concepts and a little bit of creativity will step up your lighting. The actors and the dialogue wasn't quite on point. The scene when the older brother confronts his sibling was poorly written and poorly acted.
Judge 3
Positives:
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Judge 4
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