When Doves Fail - ID# 291

Homewood-Flossmoor
Dramatic Narrative
Entry Description

Copyright Free Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTrrc6Ni5eM

Recent Teacher Comments

  • 4/26 7:02 am - Love the opening scenes camera work, excellent job with breaking up the scene with the teacher, would have liked to have seen a little bit more of that in the scene with mom, because it just sat on that shot for too long while she was doing dishes. You introduced your character (the mom), but it took so long to see her face. Loved the way you pulled into the mom and agent scene. Great natural audio in the office scene. The leadroom on the tight shots of the agent was wrong, and it would throw me off otherwise great job assembling the story. Wasn’t sure at the end what I was supposed to feel, if you were trying to make a statement, about healthcare, love, injustice, I just wasn’t sure it ended so abruptly. If you were trying to make a statement, I guess I wish it would have been a little more direct by turning on the news and hearing a headline that relates to your point etc. Nice blend of music, I never felt like it was overdone.
  • 4/25 11:57 am - The camera work was exquisite, the shot variety was good. Parallel storytelling was going on. All the elements made you care about the characters and what was going on. Very nicely done. I also loved that you had good acting, and adults and students in it.
Judge 1

Positives: Great use of J and L cuts in the edit. It made transitions from scene to scene seamless. The framing of your camera was very effective and helped to tell the story.

Improvements: Minor audio hisses here and there, but nothing major.

Judge 2

Positives: Excellent performances. Nice cinematography and well edited with a compelling story setup.

Improvements: Abrupt ending with no payoff. Needs a story resolution. Main character needs an arc.

Judge 3

Positives: This film is beautifully shot and well edited.

Improvements: The scenes with the mother towards the end aren't really working. The doctor's performance takes me out of the film.

Judge 4

Positives:

Improvements: