MeloShot - ID# 277

Barrington

Commercial

Entry Description

A commercial for MeloShot

Copyright Info

https://www.audioblocks.com/

Recent Teacher Comments

• 4/23 1:44 pm - MeloShot - good shooting, editing, and storyline

Judge 1

Positives: Like the variety of shots Nice rhythm to edit Nice audio mix Nice lighting

Improvements: Unfortunately the claim in the spot is not really believable, which is very important. Is there a way you could show the benefit of quality sleep to academic success that isn't so far fetched? F to A in a day or two feels fake. Maybe B- to an A, or C+ to an A would be more believable. The transitional moments in the edit are a little off. What motivates him to go find this product at 7-11? Has he used it before? Is there a better way to show he's well rested and on his game after he's taken the product vs. showing the same bathroom scenes? And why do we see another overnight cycle through after we've seen an A on a paper? It seems like the A should at the end of the edit.

Judge 2

Positives: Love the movement shot at the beginning. Strong opening shot is so important- great job! Great job using visuals to display changes of mood. It's tough to visually represent some of what you were trying to and you did a great job. Good use of music to show more energy as well.

Improvements: I would use graphics at the beginning of the commercial to set up your purpose immediately so people know you are talking about sleep issue so they can follow along with the story from the beginning

Judge 3

Positives: Sound: Your sound efx are very good and the music post product sample is very strong. The static confusion sound at the beginning does not work as well. Camera: Strong shots, excellent use of camera movement and angles.

Improvements: Something about the comercial made me think that Melo Shot was an energy aid. I think it is that we start with daytime. Had you started your story at :16 seconds your themes would have come through more clearly. Editing was pretty good, the pace of the first day could have been a little bit quicker, again, it takes a bit long to get to the actual product, and the shot of the actor falling asleep is to short, since we don't see him sleeping and he pops up, to upbeat music the product comes off as an energy drink and not a sleep aid. Technically sound a few tweaks of story and editing and things would come across very well.

Judge 4

Positives:

Improvements: