Pink in the Rink - ID# 412
Waubonsie Valley
News Package
Entry Description
News story on raising money to fight cancer
Copyright Info
Recent Teacher Comments
- 4/23 7:19 pm - I second the comments below and do not want to be redundant. The majority of the pieces in this category were hard to contend with because they all had unique aspects to them that stood out. What makes your piece different than another cancer story or another fundraising story? I think once you solidify this aspect, you can move forward. If you are an underclassman, keep making pieces. If you are a senior, I wish you the best in your future and congratulations!
- 3/16 8:20 pm - I thought your opening was a little quick, you stated a fact and then suddenly I found myself in the first interview. I would have loved to see more of a point to connect with your audience and their experiences on the subject to make it more personal for the viewer. For example,… “everyone probably knows someone who has dealt with cancer, and we all have different ways of dealing with it, one group…..” The opening shot also didn’t do much to grab my attention it was kind of start and static and as a result didn’t do much to draw me in. Once your story got going I think you did a nice job of narrating your audience through transitions and what was coming next, and I also thought the B-roll generally did a nice job of supporting what was being said. However, after a while it seemed more like hockey players wearing pink and playing hockey and less about the fight against cancer and what they were doing to help the cause which was a big part of what the coach was talking about. Overall you gave some relevance to the story with your interviews, I would have loved to see more intentional B Roll.
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