The Gift of the Stars - ID# 74

Lake Forest

Dramatic Narrative

Entry Description

The Gift of the Stars is a short dramatic narrative about the love and the relationship a young couple shares together. Narrated by an original poem, the short film takes a look into the beauty of young love and the power it can hold.

Copyright Info

Recent Teacher Comments

• 4/29 5:35 pm - Clear direction, excellent acting. The cinematography was beautiful. I loved the use of light and the commitment to a specific style. It is difficult to judge the technical aspects of a work that is so stylistic and leans heavy into a retro style. Regardless of whether or not your style was the result of a technical workaround or an independent decision, it 100% worked and looked completely professional. It is difficult to judge something so experimental next to dialogue driven works. I would heavily suggest going to FilmFreeway and submitting this to numerous festivals under the experimental category. Really stunning editing. Even when you had jump cuts and broke the rules, I felt safe in the hands of a skilled editor. You built a uniform and coherent piece. World building at its best. This was a true work of art. I absolutely loved it.
• 3/10 8:26 am - Maybe try a drop shadow on your titles so it stands out a little more from the light colors of your video background. I really liked the concept of this video but I felt like the three parts (audio, video, music) could have been more in sync. Let me explain what I mean. Did you intend for the recording to not be crisp, the audio was flat, you have this passionate well written text but it seemed so one dimensional. The pictures while at times were matched with the text also at times seemed to be telling their own story, so it would compete with the audio. Finally the music, not bad, but it just seemed to be there not subtracting, but not adding to the story either. Like I said earlier, I loved the concept but I didn’t feel like it came together like it could have. I loved the sequence early on, where the images flashed quickly, nicely done. It seemed like you ran out of B-roll because they were driving home but then back at the beach. Looked like you had fun filming and putting it together, but it maybe just needed a little more of shot by shot /line by line planning. It is such a passionate piece, I would have loved some more close ups of the emotion on their faces, show me that passion in their eyes, and a playful smile. Close ups help tell the story, you needed more of them. Great idea, and creative I am sure the next one like it you make will be amazing.

Judge 1

Positives: • The aesthetic/visuals are gorgeous; You all picked a wonderful location & cast the film beautifully. It evokes very strong emotions & feelings of nostalgia for me. I wish this were longer! Great job! • The poem is very well written and narrated- it really enhances the overall film.

Improvements: • More sound design could have further increased the production value! • Perhaps a larger variety of locations would keep the film more dynamic and engaging throughout.

Judge 2

Positives: The opening images establish a beautiful and relaxing narrative journey for the viewer. While the images are serene and comfortable without trepidation, the emotional components of the scene are juxtaposed with bright and loving images of the characters, laughing and loving fully. The camera plays a silent observer in the scenes of intimacy and romance, not as an intrusive stranger but as a passive viewer fully embracing the full extent of the emotions that are being expressed and shared. The images are stitched together in soft and gentle tapestry of soothing and evocative moments, further complemented by the narrator’s sonorous voice expressing all of the emotions that are being displayed. It makes for most romantic and personal journey that is proffered by the director. A beautiful poem complemented by the loving visuals.

Improvements: One of the key elements in creating a captivating narrative is to show a more vibrant and rich palette of colors with clarity and sharp focus. The overall story appears a little faded… not by choice or by happenstance. The blacks aren’t quite dark enough and whites aren’t bright enough. The latitude of the film doesn’t explore the full tonal aspect of the film, and it exists in a more or less in the ‘muddy middle.’ In this case, a more high-contrast approach would be more effective. The film is only 1 min and 50 seconds in length. The narrator could have taken more time to recite the poem, remembering to breathe between each passage and allowing the pauses to be as effective as the words being spoken. Poetry is like a song, where the words (and absence thereof) are balanced in equal measure and intensity. Just as ocean waves come and go on to the shore, the words should be spoken with the kind of gentleness and timbre that makes one feel as if each word is a precious moment. As it is now, it sounds like the narrator is memorizing a book report on ‘what I did this summer.’ Rather, it should be voiced as an expression of love of ‘what I felt last summer.’ This film could have benefitted from a considerably slower pace in the film where each word was fully savored, each breath fully drawn and each moment between the two lovers fully acknowledged. Slowing down some of the scenes could help augment the feeling of contemplation and introspection.

Judge 3

Positives: The water cinematography is quite impressive. While the editing style can be more consistent, the editing moves the story forward very well.

Improvements: Why is the resolution so low? It pixellates at full screen. With such a visual film, the subtitles are distracting. Why subtitles burned in? The audio recordings need to be improved. There is a metallic quality to the recordings that betrays the performance.

Judge 4

Positives:

Improvements: