Borderline - ID# 291

Shepard High School
Dramatic Narrative

Entry Description

This short dramatic film shows you how memories of the past never leave you.

Copyright Info

Recent Teacher Comments

  • 4/28 12:51 pm - Works well: Good job having an establishing shot at the beginning. Nice job creating a complex story with a lot of dialogue. Many students shy away from dialogue because of the technical challenges it creates – great job leaning into it! I also appreciate the focus on memory in the story. Nice cut at 2:56. What needs work: A boom pole or lav mic could have made a big difference for the audio. Also, more time spent on J and L cuts would make a big difference cleaning the audio edit. I wish I heard his footsteps while he was running through the halls. The story is sometimes a bit confusing. Final thoughts: Overall, it is a dynamic, ambitious, and personal short. Nice work!
  • 4/28 9:25 am - Works Well - Excellent job setting the mood. The cinematography and sound design work great to create anxiety and tension. The acting is very good. Interesting story structure and intentional ambiguity. Needs Work - It’s unclear what exactly happened and why, but maybe that’s part of what you were going for. The blood looked OK, but maybe it could have been messier to fit the nightmarish mood.
  • 4/27 1:40 pm - I think you use a variety of different camera shots and angles, which is great! Keep in mind the rule of thirds. Using this can really help make not only your shots better but your film as well. I think audio can be improved upon. There are many parts of your film that are difficult to hear. Most editors agree that your overall audio level of your audio mix (all of your audio combined) should fall between -10db to -20db (db = decibels). Your story is complex but it works! I think there are times where there are missed opportunities with lighting. Especially in the scene with the bathroom and the blood on the hands. You could add really dramatic lighting, or even red lighting. Your editing has great pacing and you use a great variety of sfx! I really like how you incorporated the vignettes within your edit! 0:14 - The sound here sounds like it is coming out of one channel. I’m not sure what program you use to edit. In adobe premiere, you can modify your audio channels so that they are “mono”. This means that audio will come out of both channels instead of being stereo. 0:33 - Same thing here, it’s hard to hear what is being said. Seems like sound is coming out of only the left channel. 0:33 - Good job by including the vignetting effect. It makes it seem like a flashback! 0:35 - Rule of thirds are important when framing a shot. Now you can break the rule, but you need to know what you’re doing and you need to have a reason for it. This shot would be great if the character was framed on the left third of the frame instead of being on the right. Why? Right now there is no lead room in front of the character. It also looks as if this was done on purpose because someone may sneak up behind her. 1:08 - Great use of the 180 degree rule here! 1:31 - It’s hard to hear dialogue here. 2:56 - Great use of sound with the sfx here and a great transition! 3:25 - Audio peaks and you can hear it when the character yells 3:34 - Hard to hear what is being said, audio sound like it it switches to the right channel 4:05 - We should hear the door slam since the character abruptly closes them and his footsteps. 3:44 - I love that the camera is tilted this way. It gives an uneasy feeling.
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Judge 3

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