Scenes From a TV & Film Class - ID# 438

New Trier
Comedic Narrative
Entry Description

2022 MMEA Comedic Narrative Submission

Copyright Info

Recent Teacher Comments

  • 3/6 4:52 pm - Story: The story idea is clever and fun, but I think it would have helped to understand what was the biggest hurdle. Figuring out who to root for would have helped. I think giving the audience the director's perspective with a talking head right after that opening scene would have given us as the audience an understanding of both the goal and the major problems the group faced. Camera; While the camera work definitely kept the style of the mockumentary, there were still parts that were out of focus. But a lot of the talking heads were fantastic and had engaging actors and set-design. Audio: Some audio issues where dialogue was dropped that could have been resolved with subtitles while still maintaining that mock style. Lighting; There were some lighting issues that could be resolved either by switching to a brighter environment or using some key lights and back lights to highlight both the actor and the background, particularly during some of the talking heads. Overall, you have a great edit here with a nice pace, though some sound and story errors were hard to see beyond. Keep up the good work!
  • 2/24 2:33 pm - STORY: The set up for this is actually funny, in a meta sort of way. CAMERA: I know this is supposed to be a mockumentary in the style of The Office or Parks and Rec, but you still need to have shots in focus. Camera movement and focus shifting briefly is one thing, but there were a LOT of shots that were out of focus. EDITING: The editing pace was a little choppy at times. Not sure if that’s because you were trying to keep it under 5 minutes or not. LIGHTING: Numerous shots were not lit; remember that even when you intend for a scene to be dark, you still need sufficient light to make a decent image. AUDIO: Most of the audio was okay; there were some loud parts and parts where the music seemed a bit too high in the mix. As a rule, primary dialogue should be between -6 and -12 on the VU meter, sound effects between -12 and -18, and then music beds between -18 and -24.
Judge 1

Positives: Nice job having different personalities for each of the characters. This might seem obvious, but so so often we're given a trio (or more) of mostly identical character personalities. These guys were all fun, nice work. Enjoyed the reveal of the cameraman as character at the very end - I noticed right away that with it being handheld, with a couple of borderline direct-address moments to the camera in scene, and then deliberate talking-head interviews later - this had all the feel of a documentary (mockumentary) - which begs the question: who's the cameraman? Glad he showed up.

Improvements: After the sabotage - they get a Cease and Desist? Didn't follow the logic of this one at all. Did they submit their film, and it was so bad, that they got a CnD? Hence the actors talking about their performances? Unfortunately, the logic of the narrative broke down here. Ok, I loved the idea of "we're bad at this... let's cheat." But - would have liked a little more attention to WHY they're bad. Was told by characters that they're bad actors, but frankly: they weren't terrible. Could have come up with some other reasons why they can't get it done, and why they need to resort to sabotage. Also, wasn't sure what exactly they sabotaged... Saw them enter the room, and then we cut to them being notified.

Judge 2

Positives: Cutting to the green screen room for the reveal that this is a film class is great! Also a really smart choice to change the aspect ratio of the piece when we switch between the film they are making and the documentary crew's.

Improvements: You introduce talking heads a bit late in the piece. We don't get an interview until after the results. That being said at times the pacing of the piece slows down while we're in wide shots or in shots where two or three people are interacting. Overall, it could just be tightened a bit. A lot of these problems could be fixed by inserting some talking heads of the characters throughout. This will also help establish these characters better and develop them. It's part of the genre so don't be afraid to use some interviews! Though the changing of the aspect ratio helped differentiate the movie they're making from the documentary, at times the worlds still felt similar. I would really try to make those movie shots super cinematic and almost cheesy with the dialogue and such to help drive that message home. Maybe even color them differently in post.

Judge 3

Positives: Really funny dialogue, and despite the jokes about the bad acting, pretty great acting! I The iStock background in the beginning was a nice touch. This was a really funny film, and I'd love to see a whole lot more! Definitely made me actually laugh more than any other entry. Great work.

Improvements: I think the movie could've use a tad more structure and shown us a bit more. I'd like to have seen what the sabotage was, and I would have loved to have caught a quick glimpse of the film that wasn't towards the end. Maybe just a few quick shots strung together. This might be something I missed, but I was a bit confused by the cease and desist order, and I would've liked a bit more explanation there. Also a shot of the computer screen would have added a nice touch to that scene.

Judge 4

Positives:

Improvements: