HF Steppers - ID# 183
Homewood-Flossmoor
Natural Audio News Package
Entry Description
Background behind expressions and emotions HF step team makes during a performance.
Copyright Info
Recent Teacher Comments
- 4/18 12:57 pm - It was really hard for me knowing this is a natural sound package and for the first 30 seconds you are showing the routine where you hear hands clapping and feet stomping and yet all I saw through most of the sequence was their faces. To me a natural sound package should not just have the audio, but show it too, make the experience as authentic as you can for your audience. I get angry faces is part of their routine, but so is the stomping and clapping and you really didn’t get your audience to focus on that (especially since angry faces don't make noise). When you talk about anger faces, give me more of a close up, when you talk about stomping in sync, show me that (your b-roll literally cut off their feet at 1:31 after talking about that). I feel like this story was put together after you had your footage as opposed to planning out the shots you needed (ie close ups, feet, audience reactions, etc). Your piece came across a little choppy because the interviews were short (which they generally should be) but then the B-Roll audio clips in between were equally short, so the audio would jump up and down instead of tapering off as a new interview started so throughout your piece I just kind of felt like I was a yo yo going up and down. I didn’t feel like I really learned what your group is about. Except that you channel all the anger and aggression you have and put it in your performance. And if that is what the story truly is about, I guess I would try and leave your audience with something positive by the time you get to the end, because I ended up feeling sad for all these girls that come together and channel all the ugly parts of their life. Maybe hearing from an audience member might have balanced that out. Like I said switch it into something positive, hard work, friendship, something I can feel good about. Maybe that is corny, but after watching your story I didn’t really have a new appreciation for how hard you work, instead, I was just sad that your focus is anger. Hopefully, I misread the story, I am just sharing how I felt.
- 4/16 1:27 pm - Good package! Great start with the natural audio letting the viewers hear what stepping is - that's a great way to engage your viewers! Great sound bytes from the interviews telling the audience what stepping is all about. Be careful to not fade out the sounds bytes too quickly so that the last word or even last few consonants of a word are missed. Good use of natural audio in between sound bytes to help tell the story. All other technical aspects of the interviews and the b-roll were good - good framing and good lighting. Nice job!
- 3/6 2:16 pm - I loved the opening sequence of the team performing. This was incredibly engaging, was well cut together, and made me excited to hear this story. For your interviews, I would zoom out a bit to ensure a little less headroom. I really enjoyed learning about stepping, but would suggest moving your interviews around to tell a more organized story. For example, I would first tell us about the origins of stepping and THEN tell about the emotions felt while stepping instead of the reverse. This could be helpful if your viewer is not familiar with this art form. I'm also left wondering as your audience how can I see this team perform? It would have been great to hear when the group is performing next at your school to connect back to your audience!
Judge 1
Positives: Love the natural sound of the team stepping before we even hear any kind of interview. I feel like we are right there with them in practice. Nice transitions to use the sound and interviews to flow the story from one part to the other.
Improvements: Use a tripod. You can tell which shots were filmed with one and which ones were filmed without one. The story doesn't need "fade to blacks" to transition. Instead use tight shots of feet or hands, even facial expressions to help transition.
Judge 2
Positives: Good quality interview sound. I am interested in step shows and want to see more.
Improvements: Missing a big wide shot establishing the scene. The viewer needs to know where we are and the context of subjects to their environment. Too many talking heads. Step shows are exciting and we don't get to experience that emotion enough. We see a shot of a performance then cutaway to talking head. Shot sequences of the competition showing action and audience reaction would help convey the emotion better.
Judge 3
Positives: I loved the way you began this package. It was a nice slow burn into the story with the countdown and then the sound of the steppers. It took a full 30 seconds but I was captivated the whole 30 seconds. The two interviews flowed well into each other. The way you cut the soundbites makes it feel like one cohesive narrative instead of two disjointed interviews.
Improvements: Don't center your interview subjects in the frame. Put them in the left or right third of the frame, with their bodies positioned towards the other end of the frame. You had 15 more seconds for this package (it could be 2 min total) and I was left wanting at least one more soundbite. I would have loved to learn more about the roots of stepping, or maybe hear from the coach, or why this team is different from other teams, which one of the girls mentioned.
Judge 4
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Judge 5
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