Misguided - ID# 246
Metea Valley
Dramatic Narrative
Entry Description
Royalty free music provided by Soundstripe.com
Copyright Info
Recent Teacher Comments
- 4/21 1:10 pm - So much is going very well in this. An example of a very professional and impactful sequence is 0:47-1:13. This color grade is superb. 1:32-1:59 - Great montage that shows the passing of time and explains her personality. In fact there are many great montages that move the story along effectively in such a short period of time. Overall, this is an extremely ambitious film with characters, props, and a complicated story. Congrats to you for swinging for the fences. In regards to story, sound, camera/composition, lighting, and editing – there are moments where you excel in each of these categories and it is clear that you have a strong knowledge of the craft. Then in other moments, they really struggle and have major gaps. This often happens on the most ambitious of projects, and that is okay. However, for future projects, I would strongly recommend simplifying these things in order to avoid mistakes. For example, the shot at 1:18 is extremely shaky. Just using a tripod here would go such a long way. There are audio issues throughout where J & L cuts could have made a big difference. And in regards to the story, it feels like there is not much of a motivation for the romantic interest to be evil – and ultimately this is the entire crux of the story. Her revelation is exciting and well filmed, but something should have tipped the audience earlier (a seed could have been planted earlier to suggest something was off with his behavior) or there could be a more clear motivation written into the script (for example, is there a reason why he would hate the family? something more compelling and complicated than just that "he's evil.") Still, great work! Keep at it! You are clearly a very skilled filmmaker.
- 3/1 2:04 pm - Story: I thought you had an interesting story overall. I was a little confused about the main character. Is this character a sister or a mother to the other character in the flashback? Right now, it’s portrayed as if she were the mother. Sound: Throughout your audio, you can “hear” where the audio cuts (Ex: 0:47 - you can hear the cut of the background noise; 1:27, 2:12). A solution to this would be to use J and L cuts. This is where you layer your audio track on different tracks. You then extend the beginning and ends of each track so that they blend into each other. Sometimes these J and L cuts may not work depending on when your audio starts and ends. At 0:05, the audio of the newscast repeats for a brief second here. At 0:17 it would be nice to have the voice over you added to sound like it was coming from the TV. Not sure if you use Final Cut, Premiere, or Resolve but all of these programs should have audio editing tools built in. You can play with different effects and try to get the audio to sound like it’s coming from a TV. Great use of the sound effect at 0:19! There are a few times that I wanted to hear things. For example, at 0:30 it would be nice to hear the character sign. At 1:34 and 1:35 it would be nice to hear the items being grabbed off the counter. At 0:41, it sounds like your character’s audio is coming through a phone. Was there an effect put on the audio here? 1:27 is a spot that could use a J and L cut. There is also a buzzing sound in the background. Maybe it was the fridge? Appliances in kitchens are things you want to watch out for. If you’re filming scenes in the kitchen, sometimes it's worth turning off or unplugging appliances for a little bit. At 2:13, for a brief moment, it looks like the audio doesn’t match what the boy is saying. Great job with the mix at 2:21. I love how it cuts off here! At 2:33 and 2:59 the music was too loud to hear what the characters were saying. Bring the music down slightly so we can better hear what the characters say. Even if it’s just for a couple of seconds. Camera: Overall, you demonstrate great camera composition. I love your shots specifically at 0:23, 2:21, and at 3:34! There is a moment where you have an out of focus shot at 0:10 - 0:14 while your character was moving in the kitchen. The shot at 2:21 is great and it works! However, the framing can be worked on. You want your subject to have lead room in front of them. The way this shot is framed right now makes it seem like something is going to jump out behind your subject. Lighting: Lighting was used effectively throughout your film. The scene outside of the school has harsh lighting which creates harsh shadows on your actors. You can use a diffuser to spread out the light more (Large bed sheets could work too). Editing: Great job with editing! I love the effect that you put on during the flashback scene. It really does make it feel like a dream/flashback. You include some really great transitions like at 1:51. And I really love the cut at 3:43! It was really effective. One thing that I would do differently is change the title placement. Right now, it comes in at the middle of the film and creates a distraction from your story.
- 2/23 10:08 am - Camera: your handheld camera work is a bit shaky. Handheld camera work for a scene like this isn’t necessary because you don’t have any action in the story of your film that would justify shaky camera work. It ends up just being really distracting. Lighting: It looks like you used available lighting in your locations and did not add any additional lighting to enhance your shots. Sound: the initial news report on TV should have had one consistent soundtrack, but it clearly jumped when you switched to the next shot in the kitchen. Then, when you insert the voice over, it is overmodulated (way too loud) and clearly NOT coming from the TV. This mismatch is a huge problem. You could have fixed this by just recording someone reading the news reports and then adjusting the audio track with filters (to make it sound distant like it was coming out of a TV), or you could have recorded the news reports and then played it off of a computer, and then recorded THAT sound, to make it more authentic. Editing: the choice to put the film’s title 2 minutes into the film is just awkward. Either put it within the first 30 seconds, or don’t do it at all. The editing pace of your film is fine, but there were some choppy sequences going from a scene with dialogue (2:11-2:21) and just smashing into a music bed and cutting dialogue out within the same scene. This is jarring. Story: The story was confusing, particularly at the end.
Judge 1
Positives: • I really like the concept & complexity of the narrative • Some very thoughtful, inspired camera work showcased throughout- especially the kitchen scene around the 1:00 mark- beautifully shot & edited w/ lots of natural light.
Improvements: • There needs to be a clearer connection between our lead's missing sister & the guy at the end- I believe I understand what's happening here but it's not totally clear other than the blue hairpiece that links everything together. More visual clues would have helped! • The music choice is solid but could be a bit more ominous to help foreshadow the ending.
Judge 2
Positives: The dream sequence is well edited to notice the difference; Lighting and exposure is nice
Improvements: Narratively the story's style doesn't feel consistent; Careful with volume, some sounds unbalanced
Judge 3
Positives: I liked the framing of the shots throughout the film and thought the pacing was good towards the end. I also liked the lighting in the kitchen at the beginning.
Improvements: I think the audio in multiple places could have been better (the TV and just in general it had an echo). There were a lot of jump cuts and overall made the story hard to follow at times.
Judge 4
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Judge 5
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