Nyctophobia Short Film - ID# 338
Waubonsie Valley
Dramatic Narrative
Entry Description
a short film about the fear of the dark
Copyright Info
Recent Teacher Comments
- 3/2 9:02 am - Story: I was a bit confused about the story. It also ends very abruptly and feels unfinished. What are the relationships between the characters? Are they friends or part of a gang? Sound: Overall, your audio is okay. Your audio levels are different at different times. Sometimes it’s too loud (ex: 1:08) or sometimes it’s too quiet. A great example of audio in your film is at 0:37. It’s very clear! You used sound effects at the right time (like at 1:04) to convey the mood/tone of your film. At 1:46 your character’s audio is cut off before it cuts to the next shot. Overall I would suggest using J and L cuts to hide your audio cuts. This is where you layer your audio track on different tracks. You then extend the beginning and ends of each track so that they blend into each other. Sometimes these J and L cuts may not work depending on when your audio starts and ends Camera: You definitely used a variety of different shots and angles in your film! Your boom pole is in some of the shots (ex: 1:37). And that happens often! To fix that issue, you can slighting crop/scale your shot in post. There are a couple of shots (like at 0:05 and 0:30) where your background is in focus and your actors aren’t. At 0:15 the shot here is steady and on a tripod. As you cut to the next actor at 0:20, it is shaky and handheld. Why did you make that choice for your film? At 0:20 I would suggest keeping your camera on a tripod for this shot. Lighting: Great job using the lighting you had in the scene at the alleyway. Some shots were a little too dark and we couldn’t see the emotion/expressions on character’s faces. Especially in the outdoor shots after the characters go looking for someone. Editing: Overall editing was fair. I’m not quite sure I understand the transition from 0:13 - 0:14. Why do we go from day to night here? At 2:26, you want to match action when cutting from shot to shot. In this shot, the character leaves the frame when they run away. The next shot 2:27 shows the character still kneeling next to the other character. Going from the shot at 2:26 , you probably want to cut to the next shot at 2:28. This also applies to your cut at 3:22. The shot from 2:30 to 2:40 drags on for too long. I would cut it down. At 2:53 you can see someone’s reflection in the window just above the fire alarm. Make sure you pay attention to your back/middle/foreground on set!
- 2/24 2:33 pm - I appreciate the complicated dialogue and the sense of drama. The villain was a compelling vigilante, I would have loved to have learned more about who they were and their motivations. The acting was impressive! Very solid performances and acting direction all around. Good usage of cutaways, composition, the 180 degree rule and a solid variety of shots. The abrupt end and lack of clean audio gave the feeling that this is an unfinished work. Regarding the sound, strongly recommend using more J&L audio cuts throughout, this goes a long way in smoothening out the sound and is essential for those dialogue cutaways. In future films, recommend getting 30-60 seconds or roomtone sound. This audio track can then be put under the dialogue scenes and help hide those audio cuts. Regarding the ending, there are a lot of unanswered questions, and providing some type of ending, even in a short, goes a long way. At minimum, cutting to credits with some music will allow the film to sit with audiences for a moment. Lastly, the boom was in a few shots – this happens. I would suggest scaling/cropping these clips to hide that. Overall, fun and ambitious short – if things are cleaned up and an ending is added, it would be even better.
- 2/23 11:51 am - Camera: a lot of shots were out of focus. Not sure if your camera was on autofocus, but I saw the graffiti on the wall more in focus than the characters in the alley. Camera work was a little shaky; for action scenes, some camera shake is acceptable, but a lot of the scenes were static shots and should have been shot on a tripod. Lighting: it looks like you used available lighting in the locations and did not bring in any additional lighting. Sound: the sound was all over the map; background noise was too high in the mix, and some of the dialogue was louder than other parts. Audio mix is important. Editing: the editing was very choppy, and the pacing was uneven. Sometimes you’d have very quick shots within a sequence and then camp out on a long take for quite a while. Story: the story was unclear; why were the bullies being mean to the kid? Were they friends? Were they co-workers? Were they a gang of criminals? Without a sense of who the characters were or their motivations, the story makes little sense. Also, the ending felt like it just cut off without any resolution.
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