The L Word - ID# 413
Batavia
Dramatic Narrative
Entry Description
A teenage girl is faced with a challange, she is conflicted with her true emotions regading a boy. She is unable to verbalize her strong feelings, hence coining the term "The L word" and starts to vent out her emotions to her friend who cares deeply about her.
Copyright Info
Recent Teacher Comments
- 4/27 12:28 pm - Very genuine and strong performances. Excellent dialogue work. A lot of students shy away from dialogue, yours carried the piece. One thing to think about is could this have taken place in different settings or a more visually engaging environment? I understand artistically if you felt that it was important to the story to take place in a car, but for the purpose of competing in film festivals, you really want to think of ways to make your film visually engaging and creative. The sound design was very strong - the "outdoors sounds" and music really helped the piece. While I would have suggested filming in a better-lit environment, you did use the car light effectively. Overall, this story is excellent – moving, personal, believable, dramatic. I really hope to see, hear, and read more of your works! I would challenge you in future films to film a much greater variety of shots and locations.
- 4/21 1:01 pm - Story: Great job with the story as well as the directing to your actors. Both were able to convey great emotions. Your story clearly shows character development and the messaging is clear! Sound: I’m not sure if you used lav mics on your characters. Their audio did not sound clear and also peaked a few times. If you’re using a lav mic you want to make sure that the audio is clear. Sometimes if clothes are rustling against the mic, you’ll hear that in your audio recording and it won’t be as clear. Again, make sure that you watch out for when audio peaks (1:33, 2:32, 4:29). You don’t want your audio sounding too distorted. Most editors agree that your overall audio level of your audio mix (all of your audio combined) on your audio meter should fall between -10db to -20db (db = decibels). Camera: Overall you demonstrated a great understanding of the 180 degree rule with your camera work. I feel that there could have been extra shots added in such as cutaways. Or, when one of the characters talks about how she can’t look in the mirror, maybe we can see a shot of that (or a shot of the rearview mirror with the character not looking at it). Lighting: Great use of the light in the car. It really helps make your footage look better rather than having it just be completely dark. You understand that you need to bring in light when shooting at night! Editing: Great job with the pacing in your film. You held on longer with the more emotional parts of your scene. I think a lot of the time, you cut on the action. It works, but it’s also great to get reactions of what the other character is taking in. Throughout your film, your edits cut enough to where it didn’t feel like the camera shots were getting way too repetitive. However, it would still be nice to see different cutaways.
- 2/23 1:36 pm - Camera: when shooting in a tight space (like the interior of a car), you might feel limited in your shot selection. It looks like you had a few basic setups: a two-shot looking through the front windshield, a two-shot from the back seat, and two over the shoulders. But you could have added some single close ups of each of the actors, especially during the more intense emotional parts. Lighting: I’m glad you used lighting in the car. Some people shoot night scenes, and they think because they want it to look dark, they don’t need light. But you were wise to use lighting in the car. Sound: dialogue audio seemed really compressed and lacking in clarity. Some of the more intense dialogue had hot audio levels that peaked. The mix between the dialogue and the music bed was fine, but the outdoor crickets at night ambient sound was a little too loud and distracting. Editing: the editing pace worked well for this intimate and emotional scene. You stayed on some of the shots for a while, but you could have cut away to some brief reaction shots as well. Story: nice story, clearly explained conflict for the main character. But more importantly, your ability as a director here was strong. Getting actors to deliver their lines and act is not easy, so you should be proud of how this came together.
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